Excuses, excuses, excuses. Every day there seems to be a reason why I can't be the best mom to my kids. I'm tired. I don't feel well. We've been in the car too long and everyone is being crazy. She's in a bad mood. He's in a bad mood. The dog peed on the carpet, and the car battery just died.
There's always some reason my parenting comes up sub-par. And because of those "reasons" I make excuses for my sin. I excuse my impatience, my angry words, my selfishness. I blame the external things that are "causing" me to sin rather than searching my own heart and repenting.
The truth is that those external things don't cause me to sin, they just bring to the surface what's already there, bubbling within my own heart. Luke 6:45 says: "A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of." Either I can keep making excuses for my bad attitudes and harsh words towards my children, or I can recognize that the root of my impatience, my anger, my lack of joy, and my selfish attitudes all stem from my own sinful heart, and I can pray--or rather petition God--to replace those sinful fruits with His beautiful fruits of Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Goodness, Kindness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control (Galatians 5:23), character qualities that, in my mind, describe the most beautiful mother imaginable!
It's time for me to stop making excuses and start asking for forgiveness while living in (and living out) His grace. Because His beautiful fruits (and not my own sinful, rotting ones) are the character qualities I want to impart to and feed my children. They won't remember my excuses, but only how (well or poorly) I have loved them.
Lord, help me to love them well.
--Holly || @oregonmama || Oregon-mama.blogspot.com